3 Lies That Crush Your Self-worth (& 3 Truths That Set You Free)

Beauty. What a subjective word? Twisted and warped by this broken world — it’s lost its meaning. The more society tries to portray what beauty looks like… the farther away we drift from the truth.

Nowadays, women are bombarded with images and magazines instructing them how to act, how to dress, how to fit in. Sadly, self-worth has become a battle women face on a daily basis. At the sight of a stunning model, their self-worth crumbles to pieces. And what do they believe will fix this? Following these societal norms and feeding their desire for affirmation.

Without the truth, women are ill-equipped to deflect these lies. Our self-worth needs protection, a shield from the falsities shouted at us.

But that all starts with a single question: where is our worth found?

Lie #1: You need approval from man

This remains one of the greatest and most detrimental lies in our society. And you see it functioning everywhere. With the arrival of social media, the hunger for affirmation has sky-rocketed. Heart buttons and likes define our value. Comparison and envy spread like wildfire. Our society puts so much emphasis on image and outward appearance that young people start to lose sight of what really matters — their heart. They lose themselves when they start conforming to the ways of the world.

People love masking their insecurities, faking fine. Representing themselves in a positive light on the outside, when on the inside… everything’s falling apart.

People are always searching for something to fill the void inside of them — a void only Jesus can fill.

My advice for those struggling with people-pleasing characteristics is to check your motives. Find out what’s driving your desire to portray yourself a certain way or for a certain person to affirm you. Fashion and makeup are not bad things. However, they can morph into something more dangerous when the intentions of your heart are wrong.

Truth #1: Your worth is found in Christ

The truth is — no worldly possession, no abs workout, no skinny jeans can satisfy the cravings of their heart. Nothing will ever be enough.

Only Jesus can fix the broken pieces of our hearts. Only Jesus can fill the desires of our soul.

God deeply cares about us and He wants to help us battle the lies. That’s why He gave us the Bible — the ultimate source of truth. Through scripture, we find our affirmation. As Becca Eller says: “What God says about you in His word is the truth, and the truth never changes.”

So, ladies, you don’t have to prove yourself! You are not bound to the flighty standards of this world. Your identity is not found in your clothes, grades, appearance, friends, popularity, money… your identity is hidden in Christ. And because of that, YOU ARE ENOUGH. And you will always be enough.

“Your real, new self (which is Christ’s and also yours, and yours just because it is His) will not come as long as you are looking for it. It will come when you are looking for Him.” ~C.S. Lewis~

Lie #2: No one could ever love you

Rejection leaves a deep scar. Our world shouts many reasons for why we could never be loved. We’re not wearing the latest trend. We don’t have the “right” body. We’re not watching recent movies or listening to popular music. Overall, we don’t fit in. But are supposed to fit in? Is all of this normal, and we’re just… different?

Well, perhaps we’re searching for the wrong kind of love? The wrong kind of affirmation? Perhaps Love was here all along — right in front of us — but we were too blind to see it.

Truth #2: You are so loved

Let this truth sink in. Out of the depths of God’s magnificent love, He sent his perfect son to die for us–not knowing if we’d return His love. That is true love.

Nothing you ever do could make him love you less. Your heart is all he wants.

Lie #3: Your failures & mistakes define you

Regrets — we’ve all got them. Mistakes we’ve made in the past that we’d do anything to forget. Moments we wish we could rewrite. No matter how much we wish or pray, we cannot alter our history. We cannot undo those past mistakes.

After regret is implanted in our hearts, shame sprouts. An endless, vicious cycle of shame. Many believe there is no escape. They can’t change what they’ve done, they can’t change the consequences, they can’t change their life… so why try? These thoughts lead them to continue down their twisted paths, searching for ways to fulfill their hearts’ desires, searching for ways to forget…

And, though they’re wrong, there’s a bit of truth in that reasoning. They themselves can’t atone for the sins they’ve committed… but Jesus can.

Truth #3: You are forgiven

Jesus yearns to heal your wounds and wash away your sins. Your past does not define you! No lies you’ve told, bad choices you’ve made, horrible words you’ve uttered is too great for His love.

And His love does not vanish with mood swings and pits of despair. He loved — and continues to love — you at your lowest.

“God has seen our unloveliness—the deep brokenness and rebellion in our hearts—and instead of withdrawing, he pursues us to the beautiful end.” ~Matt Chandler~

You are forgiven. Again and again.

What God thinks of us matters far more than what the world thinks of us. You are loved. You are forgiven. You are enough. So who are you going to believe? A fallen world filled with lies and twisted standards? Or the God who knitted you together and calls you fearfully and wonderfully made?

Do you struggle with self-worth? What are some ways you battle it? Did these truths resonate with you? Let me know in the comments. (:

*NOTE: A good resource for battling the lies of this world is a book titled LIES YOUNG WOMEN BELIEVE.


7 responses to “3 Lies That Crush Your Self-worth (& 3 Truths That Set You Free)”

  1. Wow I loved this! I know you posted this like two months ago but I was scrolling through your content and I found this!! I love it! You are so encouraging! and this is well thought out as well as planned and formatted. Something every girl struggles with you summarized perfectly, explained exquisitely, and provided truths for! Great job girl!!

  2. Wow, Abbi! This was a really a great post. I love all three points and they are so true! I especially like the quotes. You are amazing.<3

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